I am not a fan of change.
When I was fifteen I lived in a group home in Lynn, Massachusetts just across the street from Lynn Commons. (Distracting thought: why aren't there "commons" in the four states area? You know, an oval shaped area of grass, a paved sidewalk, benches, and a gazebo usually in the middle of heavily-trafficked streets?) The group home was in a huge Victorian house with four bathrooms and five bedrooms. It was a beautiful house, maybe the nicest on the street, but everyone knew the house was a group home even without it being labeled on the outside. People just knew. I wish I just knew things sometimes. I am rarely ever thankful about being blindsided, unless of course there is some type of surprise party planned - which is nearly impossible with me. Wow I am really all over the place today. Focus Kerri, focus!
Back to the lovely group home. There were five of us teenagers that lived there at the time and every one of us had a goal of sorts. I felt like everyone in the house, with the exception of myself, had real goals whereas my goals were just silly. A few examples of others' goals were to take their medications (which I wasn't on), shower daily and have better hygiene (which I always did/do), control their anger, go to school and get good grades (I was on the honor roll then), don't do drugs (didn't), stay out of trouble, etc.
I had two goals:
1. Eat. Yes, eat food. That is something I have always struggled with. Then, I never ate enough food if any. Now I eat terrible things and too much of them.
2. Embrace change. Ha! Seriously. Accept and embrace change was my goal. Other kids were doing drugs, getting in fights, hitting staff, and skipped school almost every day and I had to eat food and embrace change.
Thirteen years later those could still be considered goals of mine. 1. Eat less. 2. Embrace and accept what God has in store for me. I am praying to be stretched, to be taken out of my comfort zone, and used for His will and purpose. Here's to stepping out in faith. And snacking on baby carrots more.